Top Ten Signs Bernard Madoff Was A Crook

1. For the past eight years, he didn't pass a pay phone without checking the coin-return slot.
2. Account statements were handwritten notes on the back of cocktail napkins.
3. He always won the NCAA Bracket challenge he ran.
4. With a name like "Made-Off", what else could he do?
5. Repeatedly spotted nose-deep in a yellow covered book entitled "Running a Ponzi Scheme for Dummies".
6. Madoff was on record as being staunchly against the Hammer/Daddy ticket.
7. When asked about his constantly outperforming trading strategy, he responded with "...agh...(cough)...Haha...Well, I can tell you one thing - This is NOT a ponzi scheme designed to steal $80B from charities...Haha...agh...".
8. He paid the boatsman half for only finishing half of the job when painting the name "Bull" on his yacht.
9. The FatHead of Frank Abagnale in his office.
10. After seeing his first round fantasy draft pick go down with a season ending injury, refusing to pay his entrance fee.

Mark Morrison's Commentary on the Current Financial Crisis

During the past twelve months, many questions have been asked regarding our current situation -

"How in god's name did a couple of mortgage brokers destroy the global economy?"
"Why has it taken so long for another post on our blog?"
"Who the hell fell asleep at the wheel watching this house of cards?"
"Do tongue rings serve any purpose other than...."

Seems every place I go, some "genius" has the answer for this global systemic failure, and they reach both ends of the spectrum. Only person that truly has the solution and has been warning about this for years - Mark Morrison. He prophecized about this some years ago in a parable he entitled "Return of the Mack"

Oh, oo-o-oh, come on, ooh, yeah
Well I tried to tell you so (yes, I did)
But I guess you didn't know, as I said the story goes
Baby, now I got the flow
'Cos I knew it from the start
Baby, when you broke my heart
That I had to come again, and show you that I'm real
(You lied to me) all those times I said that I love you
(You lied to me) yes, I tried, yes, I tried
(You lied to me) even though you know I'd die for you
(You lied to me) yes, I cried, yes, I cried

The lying, the greed, the hasty use of credit default swaps and other derivatives, the orgy of leverage were all things he tried to warn us about. He tried and tried and tried but we wouldn't listen....even when he started crying we just laughed at him behind his back.

1-(Return of the Mack) it is
(Return of the Mack) come on
(Return of the Mack) oh my God
(You know that I'll be back) here I am
(Return of the Mack) once again
(Return of the Mack) pump up the world
(Return of the Mack) watch my flow
(You know that I'll be back) here I go
So I'm back up in the game
Running things to keep my swing
Letting all the people know
That I'm back to run the show
'Cos what you did, you know, was wrong
And all the nasty things you've done
So, baby, listen carefully
While I sing my come-back song

Although he was mocked, Morrison's love for us common folk have brought him back again to fix this. His flow has opened the credit market, and he's letting all the people know to follow in his footsteps and flow. He is the one running this thing. Not Paulson. Not Bernakee. Not Barney Frank. Morrison is back baby! You don't even know what his flow is going to do next, but if it's anything like what it did for the credit markets I'll take a double flow. Shining example of his flow - we lose 500,000+ jobs and the market gains ground.

2-(You lied to me) 'cos she said she'd never turn on me (You lied to me) but you did, but you do (You lied to me) all these pains you said I'd never feel (You lied to me) but I do, but I do, do, do (Return of the Mack) here it is (Return of the Mack) hold on (Return of the Mack) don't you know (You know that I'll be back) here I go (Return of the Mack) oh little girl (Return of the Mack) wants my pearl (Return of the Mack) up and down (You know that I'll be back) round and round

Companies, Rating Agencies, CEO's...they all lied and caused much pain, even to Morrison. What, did they think he wouldn't be back? Well, he is, and he's serving those busta's a bunch of pearls, which no doubt means a brass knuckle punch to the neck.

(You know that I'll be back) don't you know
(Return of the Mack) here it is
(Return of the Mack) hold on
(Return of the Mack) be strong
(You know that I'll be back) here I go
(Return of the Mack) my little girl
(Return of the Mack) wants my pearl
(Return of the Mack) up and down
(You know that I'll be back) round and round

Mark Morrison is our leader, follow your leader! Be strong! Spread your flow....if not, we could exacerbate our problems.